We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
