I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Sorry about my life...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
