Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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