So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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