You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
