How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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