Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
