what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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