Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize
