What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize