Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
