My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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