between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
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I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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