Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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