the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Randomize
