We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
