Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
