Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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