If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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