in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
