so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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