So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
