i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
bring money and cleavage
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
