btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Randomize
