It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
