"it" just moved
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Randomize
