Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
