dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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