My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize