Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i think i scared a bird with my dick
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I just want nice things and good sex
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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