I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize