real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
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Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
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I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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