no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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