Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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