I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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