I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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