thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
