And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
