Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
