Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
