I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
