Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Too much gin, very little bucket
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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