You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
