She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Dignity is for republicans.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
