Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize