My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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