i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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