we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
