Me. At least after what I've been through.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
