this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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