people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
